Wednesday, June 16, 2010


I'm posting some images in order to get myself to write. There is so much information coming into my mind recently and I just cannot keep up with my own thoughts. Perhaps if I would blog frequently, I could hold on to a few things.

Here are some of the films I have been watching. I know that they are all not very current but I'm just getting to them.

I have been obsessed with documentaries lately, thanks to Netflix and its always available streaming content. I think partly this is because I am on an intellectual binge and the other part being that I cannot make myself pick up a book. I have a serious addiction to television and film. To me, they are no longer enjoyable or inspiring but necessary. This is terrifying to say the least and is not helping my attention span and most of the time when I sit down on the couch with my husband I fall asleep, leaving him to watch the entirety of some chick flick I made him watch, alone. Awful. I suppose I am just uncomfortable without some form of moving and sound entertainment constantly. What is wrong with me?

So, I'm in a film class for the rest of this week and the next. It's Surrealism in Film. I think it is really interesting and appreciate it a revolutionary movement, though it didn't quite bring about as much change as it hoped. So far I am annoyed with Jean Cocteau even though I am drawn to his Belle et la Bette (Beauty and the Beast) because of its dramatic costuming and illusionism. His work is just no surreal. He is so self obsessed (as I blog about myself). I wrote my paper about him. I am very nervous to get it back because I feel like I dropped the ball slowly as I went along. I was on to something in the first paragraph, but of course, I spent so long on the beginning and then I was worn out. I should have spent more time with it. I will probably continue to work on it. I feel like my writings is the best thing I can take from these kinds of classes.

I am also very intrigued by Luis Bunuel's work that I watched the past few days.

I need to begin really concentrating on my independent study. I have some of the printing logistics worked out I just need to do some test shooting and nail down my concept. I am really confused at this point. Some of my last work was about self image, using the body to reflect very internal thoughts. But now, I feel like maybe my work is far too self indulgent (not sure if that's the word). I am separating my own personal experience from the collective and I think that may not being serving anyone other than myself. I know that my experience is not any different than anyone else but I tend to think of it as therapeutic and cathartic for me. I hope that is why I do this work. I would like for it to go beyond that but I have a difficult time feeling confident in my ideas about politics and social interests; I do not understand truth and facts.

I really need to start dancing again.

I think this is the only thing that can bring me any clarity or peace.

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